Sexual health at the Methodone clinic
Disclaimer
The information on this blog is not intended as a substitute for professional medical and/or mental health advice, diagnosis, or treatment. This blog is intended for informational purposes only. Any health concern must be assessed by a doctor or another licensed and/or certified clinician.
While I worked at a methadone clinic, one of the things I got to do was to choose an evidenced based curriculum to work with while facilitating group therapy sessions. Human sexuality has been a lifelong fascination of mine. When I was a teenager and wanting to learn more about communication and boundaries, I found the website www.scarleteen.com. This website confirmed a lot of what I felt to be true ; that sexuality is varied and there are layers to it and the foundation for healthy sexuality is communication. I grew up listening to and reading Dan Savage and adored watching episodes of Sunday Night Sex Show with Sue Johanson.
The population of people I worked with at the methadone clinic struggled hard with communication and boundaries. A lot of the people there had many years or decades of experiencing being trampled on, figuratively, emotionally and physically.
When I discovered this curriculum titled, “Sexual Health in Drug and Alcohol Treatment”, written by Douglas Braun-Harvey, I knew I had discovered a gem! Unfortunately, a lot of parents and schools don’t model explicitly healthy ways for honoring boundaries and having uncomfortable conversations in a prosocial manner. When I learned about the 6 Principles of Sexual Health, I knew I had discovered Truth.
The following is what I have adapted from the work of Douglas Braun-Harvey:
Consent–It is an agreement. Just because you say yes and agree to one thing, does not automatically mean you are agreeing and saying yes to all things. Get explicit about it, make no assumptions. Consider eye contact and body language. Universal concept, every culture has an understanding of consent and how important it is for bodily and emotional autonomy.
Quick Communication Breakdown: 7% of our communication relies on verbal (words we say). 38 % is paraverbal which is our tone (how we say things). 55% is nonverbal which is facial expressions, eye contact, gestures, body language, proxemics, and touch.
2. Non-Exploitative–Things to consider: Power dynamics, age, gender, socio-economic status, relationship roles, sexual orientation. How do power dynamics impact the relationship? Are you aware when you are being controlling and manipulative towards other people and/or are you aware when other people are being controlling and manipulative towards you?
3. Honesty–What is the intention of this sexual relationship? How transparent are you about expectations and/or limitations of the relationship? Are there conversations about sexual experiences outside of that relationship such as masturbation, porn, sexual contact with other people including sexting ; is transparency about these activities important to one or all who are involved in the relationship? Are you able to be honest about your wants, needs and boundaries even if that could potentially bring embarrassment or strain or rejection to the relationship?
4. Shared Values–Is there an understanding of what is important within the sexual relationship for all participants? How do curiosity, honesty, adventurousness, and other values play into the relationship? Are they honored?
5. Protected from STI’s/Unwanted Pregnancy/Emotional Safety–Having conversations around safety. What are the important factors that go into feeling safe within the relationship? How aware are you of your personal needs for emotional safety; can you communicate those needs? What is the agreement on contraception?
6. Mutual Pleasure–How important is it that sexual experiences are mutually pleasurable and beneficial? Are all participants in the relationship able to authentically express themselves? How is desire expressed and/or received?
What is your own vision of sexual health for you?
I often wonder what the world would be like if everyone consistently received this education (at age appropriate intervals). How much more connected would we be with ourselves? How would relationships : all relationships–working, familial, romantic, ect ; how would relationships be different?????
Some music I listened to while writing this:
Sex Yeah……….MARINA
How to Be a Heartbreaker………MARINA
Let’s Talk About Sex………Salt-N-Pepa
Fetish……….Selena Gomez (feat. Gucci Mane)
Streets……….Doja Cat
Glory Box……….Portishead
I Feel Like I’m Drowning……….Two Feet
caroline…………Artemas
Transgender………..Crystal Castles
Side Note: If you find yourself in the midst of a Spiritual Awakening; Welcome to the Unofficial Club!!! I know the early days of a Spiritual Awakening can feel maddening, confusing and exhausting. There are so many ego deaths involved. The unnerving questioning of Identity, questioning the meaning of this life, past life memories resurfacing, experiencing intense and energy draining Ascension symptoms, the list goes on. I know when I was in the early days of going through the Initiation of a Spiritual Awakening; I experienced confusion, loneliness, and a lack of direction. What I wished I had during those days was some kind of guide…maybe even a coach? A Wellness Coach. That is exactly why I offer these kinds of wellness coaching services. I know how valuable it is to be able to talk about experiencing ALL of the kinds of experiences that come with going through a Spiritual Awakening. I understand the kind of peace one can receive when they get the support that they need.
Also, if you find that you are at a crossroads with the relationship you have with your Sexual Wellness and have serious questions or qualms about it, working with a coach may be helpful. Again, I understand how participating within a working relationship, how working with a coach, can lend vital support around having clarity and ease within oneself over time. Working with a Wellness Coach to support you in understanding a core human experience such as sexuality can play a big role in Growth and Expansion.
Working with a Wellness Coach can be an essential part of one’s Soul-U-tioN.
To schedule your free, initial consultation, click on “Book Session”.
Peace be with you.
Much Love.
